Thank you, Jennifer! All my life, I have noticed the details, the big picture, and back again. (a blessing and a curse-it holds true for the "bad stuff" too). Thank you for reading and also for responding!
I'm really enjoying your writing. Your humor edges out and it reminds me of the you I used to know and why we were such good friends. Thanks for sharing.
I really get uncomfotable with anything under 40 degrees. My friend says it just means I don't have the proper clothes and my answer is yeah, I don't. I also really dislike being overheated in layers and not being able to shed them (like in a packed subway.)
So back to the land of shorts and air conditioning.
Thank you! Yes, we did a LOT of laughing-good for the heart and soul. I think, that if I lived somewhere where it never dipped below 70 degrees or above 80, I'd be fine. Does such a place exist?
I was living in NYC and loving life! After all, “I made it”! I’d done the unthinkable and conquered my 14-year-old fear of being in NYC alone. I was working at a brokerage firm and trading stocks on Wall Street. It was a very fast-paced life—getting on and off the subway trains, walking to and from my job, grabbing lunch, etc. I was ever so proud to have moved away from home and set up my own in Brooklyn.
I remember the day vividly… I was working that day on a project and, of course, doing my best to bring it to completion, I drank 6-7 cups of coffee that day (serious motivation)! As I was riding the subway train home in the most squished quarters possible, I began to feel a sweat forming combined with the oddest chill. Strange, i thought, it was a relatively warm day, yet here I am with this sensation.
I drudged up the stairs from the train station and began the 3-block walk to my home and noticed my breathing became labored. What is this? I’m a 22-year-old healthy young women and yet I felt tremendously old and out of shape! I didn’t want anyone to see my weak moment for fear I’d be taken advantage of. Worst still, I didn’t want to fall to the ground as I just knew passersby would step over me like a discarded wrapper.
I made my way up the 3 flights of stairs to my apartment and collapsed in my lounge chair. Somehow, that did not bring any relief! I went to my neighbor’s unit across the hall just in case. She gave me some water and stared at me not knowing what else to do. Suddenly, I shot straight up from her chair, my heart beating wildly out of my chest and hollered for her to call an ambulance! As she was talking on the phone, she was asked questions like was I on hallucinogenics, did I have a mental illness, etc. ironically, that line of questioning made me exclaim for her to hang up the phone. I went back to my unit and called home.
I explained to my dad what happened and he calmly directed me to make a pot of broccoli. I made that pot, but went to the doctor the next day. She said I’d had an anxiety attack and to… go take a walk! Needless to say, it took me several years to gain a genuine understanding of anxiety and panic attacks. Oh, and I stopped drinking coffee!!
Broccoli???? I guess that was his way (smart really) to center your mind, calm you and provide focus. Oh, panic and anxiety-a double whammy if there ever was one! Love reading your stories and so glad that "genuine understanding" came to you (don't mean to make it sound like magical thought-I know it took work!)
I love the fact that you remember your university years in such vivid detail. What a gift! Thanks for sharing some of your memories.
Thank you, Jennifer! All my life, I have noticed the details, the big picture, and back again. (a blessing and a curse-it holds true for the "bad stuff" too). Thank you for reading and also for responding!
I tried to rerply to part one and could not.
I'm really enjoying your writing. Your humor edges out and it reminds me of the you I used to know and why we were such good friends. Thanks for sharing.
I really get uncomfotable with anything under 40 degrees. My friend says it just means I don't have the proper clothes and my answer is yeah, I don't. I also really dislike being overheated in layers and not being able to shed them (like in a packed subway.)
So back to the land of shorts and air conditioning.
Thank you! Yes, we did a LOT of laughing-good for the heart and soul. I think, that if I lived somewhere where it never dipped below 70 degrees or above 80, I'd be fine. Does such a place exist?
I was living in NYC and loving life! After all, “I made it”! I’d done the unthinkable and conquered my 14-year-old fear of being in NYC alone. I was working at a brokerage firm and trading stocks on Wall Street. It was a very fast-paced life—getting on and off the subway trains, walking to and from my job, grabbing lunch, etc. I was ever so proud to have moved away from home and set up my own in Brooklyn.
I remember the day vividly… I was working that day on a project and, of course, doing my best to bring it to completion, I drank 6-7 cups of coffee that day (serious motivation)! As I was riding the subway train home in the most squished quarters possible, I began to feel a sweat forming combined with the oddest chill. Strange, i thought, it was a relatively warm day, yet here I am with this sensation.
I drudged up the stairs from the train station and began the 3-block walk to my home and noticed my breathing became labored. What is this? I’m a 22-year-old healthy young women and yet I felt tremendously old and out of shape! I didn’t want anyone to see my weak moment for fear I’d be taken advantage of. Worst still, I didn’t want to fall to the ground as I just knew passersby would step over me like a discarded wrapper.
I made my way up the 3 flights of stairs to my apartment and collapsed in my lounge chair. Somehow, that did not bring any relief! I went to my neighbor’s unit across the hall just in case. She gave me some water and stared at me not knowing what else to do. Suddenly, I shot straight up from her chair, my heart beating wildly out of my chest and hollered for her to call an ambulance! As she was talking on the phone, she was asked questions like was I on hallucinogenics, did I have a mental illness, etc. ironically, that line of questioning made me exclaim for her to hang up the phone. I went back to my unit and called home.
I explained to my dad what happened and he calmly directed me to make a pot of broccoli. I made that pot, but went to the doctor the next day. She said I’d had an anxiety attack and to… go take a walk! Needless to say, it took me several years to gain a genuine understanding of anxiety and panic attacks. Oh, and I stopped drinking coffee!!
Broccoli???? I guess that was his way (smart really) to center your mind, calm you and provide focus. Oh, panic and anxiety-a double whammy if there ever was one! Love reading your stories and so glad that "genuine understanding" came to you (don't mean to make it sound like magical thought-I know it took work!)
Well, there was that marriage I endured for the better part of a decade...
Can't wait for the next installment, Mary! Love all the little details (a fish stick in the pocket!).
I want to read your writing about that!
Thank you, Holly! How lovely to have made a friend in you through writing/reading the works of others.