I Love Commas

She Was a Rule Bender

    

I love commas. I don’t love rules. I understand the need for rules, but I have my own set of writing rules. One of them, is that I write like I talk, so I put a comma in, where I would naturally pause as a speaker or reader.

      If I do not put those commas in, you will not be reading my piece as I meant it to sound. So you see, I need my commas where I put them. Does that make me a Comma Rebel? Does the reader who has never heard me speak and/or met me, think I’m devoid of all punctuation knowledge? Perhaps. Part of me, really doesn’t give a damn, and the other part of me thinks that if I don’t conform, I will not be published anywhere but here on my own site, where I can do whatever I please.

     I grew up with 5,000 rules as the child of a military officer. We were told numerous times, that the importance of following said rules, were to show honor for the family and also to keep Dad’s military career from being derailed. (Bratty, unruly children were a detriment and seen as one unable to keep “the troops” in line.)

      I will include an audio with this piece, so as you read along (Note how I assume you will do so. Is that a rule?), you can hear, see the need for my commas.

     Is that what is going to be printed on my gravestone? “She loved her commas, and died on the sword for them.” I haven’t decided yet on the whole burial versus cremation thing. I do know, that it seems highly ludicrous to me to have mattresses, pillows, dense wood caskets that will probably never biodegrade, cluttering up the land. Is that part of the cause of global warming? Is it because large swaths of land are covered in impenetrable cases, impeding the natural cycle of biodegradation? Oh dear, I have digressed.

     Who made up all these rules anyway? I read that the classic Struck and White is going out of print. Who or what will take their place? A Social Media Influencer?

     Hey, I’ve got a rule. Let’s all be good humans. Let’s invite people who are fleeing their countries because of war, fear, and any number of horrific events, into our country. How can we not? We took this country from people who already lived here! Who are we to say, “Oh, sorry, we’ve reached our quota?” Let’s provide opportunities for people to thrive instead of judging them harshly with platitudes such as, “Well, in my day, we picked ourselves up by our bootstraps and did right by our families.”

     Okay, people, there never has been a Greatest Generation, and there never will be. Be a good human. Oh, and while you’re at it, join me in my, “Free the Commas” campaign. Ha/ha

     Thank you for reading, and thank you for listening. Drop me a comment below. What’s on your mind today?